IUBIREA DE SINE

Procesul Iubirii de sine

Aşa cum spunea în postarea – ,,Cu cât te focalizezi mai mult asupra aspectelor nedorite, cu atât mai mult le amplifici”, oricare ar fi problema, principalul aspect asupra căruia trebuie să lucrezi este IUBIREA DE SINE. Aceasta este ,, bagheta magică” ce dizolvă toate problemele.

Îți mai aduci aminte de cele mai frumoase vremuri când te simțeai bine în pielea ta şi te bucurai de viața ta?

Îți mai aduci aminte de perioada în care te-ai îndrăgostit sau de acele perioade din viața în care erai fericit şi nu aveai probleme de niciun fel?

Ei bine, te asigur că dacă vei cultiva cu sinceritate iubirea de sine, vei retrăi aceste momente şi vei experimenta o stare atât de euforică încât ți se va părea că dansezi plutind în aer, IUBIREA DE SINE TE FACE ÎNTOTDEAUNA SĂ TE SIMȚI BINE.

Este imposibil să te iubeşti cu adevărat pe tine însuți dacă nu eşti capabil să te accepți şi să te aprobi aşa cum eşti. Asta înseamnă să nu te critici niciodată. Parcă văd şi aud pe unii cititori obiectând: ,,Bine, dar eu nu m-am criticat niciodată”, ,,Cum ar putea să-mi placă acest aspect în legătură cu mine însumi?”, ,,Părinții / profesorii / partenerii mei de afaceri  / sefii / partenerii mei de viață m-au criticat întotdeauna”, Cum m-aş putea simți motivat?”, Bine , dar este greşit că fac toate aceste lucruri”, Cum m-aş putea schimba în bine dacă nu mă critic singur?”

Antrenarea minții

Astfel de replici țin de vechiul tău mod de a gândi, de vechiul tău dialog interior. Acum vezi cât de bine ți-ai antrenat mintea să te critice şi să opună rezistență în fața schimbării?. Ignoră aceste gânduri şi continuă să lucrezi cu tine însuți!

Să revenim puțin la exercițiul cu oglinda pe care l-am prezentat în articole-le precedente. Priveşte-te din nou în oglindă şi spune ,,Mă iubesc şi mă accept pe mine însumi, exact aşa cum sunt.”

Cum te simți acum? Nu cumva ti-a fost mult mai uşor să spui aceste cuvinte după exercițiile anterioare în care am lucrat asupra iertării? Autoaprobarea şi acceptarea de sine reprezintă cele două chei ale oricărei schimbări în bine.

În perioada în care practicăm însune foarte insistent negarea de sine,obijnuiam să îmi trag din când în când câte o palmă peste față. În acea vreme nu cunoşteam  semnificația acceptări de sine. Convingerea mea în propriile mele lipsuri şi limitări era atât de puternică încât nimeni pe lume nu m-ar fi putut convinge de contrariu. Dacă cineva îmi spunea că sunt iubită, îi ripostam imediat cu aciditate: ,,De ce? Ce ar putea vedea ceilalți la mine?” Alteori, prin minte îmi treceau gânduri de genul: ,,Dacă ar şti ei cum sunt cu adevărat, nu cred că m-ar mai iubi!”

În acea vreme nu eram deloc conştientă că orice schimbare în bine începe numai odată cu acceptarea de sine şi cu iubitea de sine. Din acest motiv, mi-a luat destul de mult timp până când am reuşit să îmi cultiv o relație armonioasă şi împăcată cu mine însămi.

Am început acest proces gândindu-mă cât mai des, mai fregvent la ,, aspectele mele pozitive”, oricât de minore mi s-ar fi părut acestea. Acesstă schimbare a atitudinii interioate m-a ajutat, iar starea mea de sănătate începe întotdeauna cu IUBIRRA DE SINE; la fel şi prosperitatea, relațiile armonioase şi exprimarea propriului potențial creator.

Mai târziu am învățat să mă iubesc şi să mă aprob în totalitate, inclusiv acele calități pe care nu le consideram ,,foarte bune”. Abia de atunci am început să fac adevărate progrese!

Exercițiu: Mă aprob pe mine însumi

Am exersat eu, am recomandat acest exercițiu la sute de persoane, iar rezultatele obținute au fost pur şi simplu fenomenale.

Timp de o lună, repetă-ți cât de des poți ,,MĂ APROB PE MINE ÎNSUMI”. Fă acest lucru de cel puțin 3-400 de ori pe zi. Ştiu că pare prea mult, dar nu este. Atunci când îți faci griji, tu repeți chestiunea, problema care te preocupă de cel puțin tot atâtea ori. Încearcă de această dată şi cu afirmația pozitivă. Transformă expresia ,, MĂ APROB PE MINE ÎNSUMI” într-o mantră şi repet-o la infinit, aproape nonstop în gândul tău şi când eşti singur spune cu voce tare.

Repetarea acestei expresii reprezintă o metodă garantată prin care poți scoate la suprafața conştiinței aproape toate gândurile ascunse care se află în opoziție.

Dacă în mintea ta apar gânduri de genul: ,,Cum m-aş putea aproba pe mine însumi câtă vreme sunt gras?”, ,,Este o prostie să cred că această metodă va funcționa”.,,Nu sunt bun de nimic”, sau oricare astfel de afirmații negative, preia imediat controlul asupra minții tale.

Nu acorda acestor gânduri negative nicio importanță. Ele sunt doar nişte reflexe ale vechiului tău mod de a gândi, care încearcă să te țină blocat în trecut.

Spune-le cu blândețe acestor gânduri: ,,Vă eliberez. Mă aprob pe mine însumi.”

Schimbă intenția de a practica acest exercițiu poate aduce la suprafață conştiinței foarte multe blocaje interioare, de genul: ,,Mi se pare o prostie”, ,,Nu cred că va funcționa”, ,,Este o minciună”, ,,Sună aiurea” sau ,,Cum m-aş putea aproba pe mine însumi când fac aşa ceva?”

Lasă acele gânduri să plece aşa cum au venit. Ele sunt gândurile tale care opun rezistență. În realitate, nu au nicio putere asupra ta dacă nu optezi pentru a le da crezare.

,,Mă aprob pe mine însumi. Mâ aprob pe mine însumi. Mă aprob pe mine însumi.” Orice s-ar întâmpla, oricine ți-ar spune şi orice ți-ar face ceilalți oameni, repetă la infinit această frază. Dacă o vei putea repeta inclusiv atunci când altcineva îți spune sau face ceva care nu eşti de acord, acesta este cel mai bun semn câ schimbarea şi creşterea ta au început deja.

Când eşti diferit uneori nu poţi vedea milioanele de oameni care te acceptă şi te apreciează aşa cum eşti tu la adevărata ta valoare, şi tu observi doar persoanele care nu te plac şi nu te acceptă.

Gândurile nu au nici o putere asupra ta, dacă nu le dai credit. Ele rămân simple cuvinte adunate împreună, fără nicio semnificație. Tu eşti cel care le acordă semnificația. De aceea, nu mai cultiva aceste gânduri care te stimulează şi care îți susțin moralul.

Un aspect important al acceptării de sine este eliberarea de părerile celorlalți oamenii. Dacă aş fi alături de tine şi ți-aş repeta într-una: ,,Tu eşti un prost, Tu eşti un prost”, probabil că ai râde de mine, sau probabil ai crede că sunt nebună. Ar fi foarte puțin probabil să mă crezi pe cuvânt. Şi totuşi, foarte multe din lucrurile pe care ai ajuns sa le crezi de-a lungul vieții sunt la fel de stupide şi de neadevărate. De pildă, convingerea că prețuire de sine depinde de forma corpului tău este versiunea ta personală a convingerii că ,,tu eşti un prost.”

Adeseori, aspectele personale pe care le consideri ,,greşite” reprezintă simple expresii ale personalității noastre. Ele sun cele care ne conferă unicitate, făcându-ne cu totul speciali. Natura nu se repetă niciodată. De când a apărut această planetă, nu au existat doi fulgi de nea identici sau două picături de ploaie similare. La fel, nicun fir de iarbă nu seamănă unul cu altul. Amprentele noastre sunt diferite de ale celorlalți oameni. La fel şi personalitățile noastre. Exact aceasta este scopul să fim diferiți uni de alți. Dacâ am accepta acest lucru, pentru noi nu vor mai exista competiția şi comparațiile.

Încercarea de a fi la fel ca ceilalți nu face decât să îți schilodească sufletul. Noi ne-am născut pe această lume tocmai pentru a ne exprima propria esență, nu pe a celorlalți oameni.

Eu însămi nu am aflat cine sunt cu adevărat până când nu am învățat să mă iubesc pe mine însămi, exact aşa cum sunt în acest moment.

Gândeşte-te numai la lucrurile care te fac fericit. Fă numai acțiuni care te fac fericit. Cultivă exclusiv compania oamenilor care te fac fericit . Mănâncă numai alimente care te fac să te simți bine. Orice ai face, avansează în ritmul care te face să te simți confortabil.

Ai încredere în tine. Ai încredere în viaţă. Totul este perfect în lumea ta, exact aşa cum trebuie să fie.

Louise L. Hay

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